I think there are some depth reflections to consider. A lot of the harms we all perpetuate to ourselves and others are from what we dont know. A lot of enacted abuses are because we don't pick up.our own responsibility. And how does our avoidance perpetuate these issues? How do we collaborate in protecting others too? Most often some of these situations are opportunities to develop skills. If we avoid that skills development such as fine tuning care skills, improving our ability to tolerate anxiety about missing work, learning to be assertive with our employers we have reduced our skillset and in some ways decided some people's skills have no value. So at that time one partner loses money and status. Also, how does this play out later down the line? My friend had to teach her husband how to care for his dying father. Hydrate him, keep him warm, soothe him, engage and distract him. He had capability for the emotional side but not the practicalities. So by avoiding developing care skills he was left short on the skills he needed for other things too. As well as the issues arising of not having done that for his sons. What difference might managing these unknown areas make to our own health and well being, our ability to nuture and care for ourselves. These opt outs can stand to do a vast range of harms in our society. I could go on. I like the quote about opportunity looking like hardwork as long as we also focus on the importance of rest.
I think the bigger issue is that we should not be focusing on good men. A man that either safe or unsafe. Good is performative and no one really cares because otherwise if you look at that? You’re in trouble.
I love your reframe as a practice, not a label.
This is some productive self-reflection. Now go change the world.
I think there are some depth reflections to consider. A lot of the harms we all perpetuate to ourselves and others are from what we dont know. A lot of enacted abuses are because we don't pick up.our own responsibility. And how does our avoidance perpetuate these issues? How do we collaborate in protecting others too? Most often some of these situations are opportunities to develop skills. If we avoid that skills development such as fine tuning care skills, improving our ability to tolerate anxiety about missing work, learning to be assertive with our employers we have reduced our skillset and in some ways decided some people's skills have no value. So at that time one partner loses money and status. Also, how does this play out later down the line? My friend had to teach her husband how to care for his dying father. Hydrate him, keep him warm, soothe him, engage and distract him. He had capability for the emotional side but not the practicalities. So by avoiding developing care skills he was left short on the skills he needed for other things too. As well as the issues arising of not having done that for his sons. What difference might managing these unknown areas make to our own health and well being, our ability to nuture and care for ourselves. These opt outs can stand to do a vast range of harms in our society. I could go on. I like the quote about opportunity looking like hardwork as long as we also focus on the importance of rest.
Excellent, as always. Your self awareness is not only a gift to yourself, but to the rest of us.
I think the bigger issue is that we should not be focusing on good men. A man that either safe or unsafe. Good is performative and no one really cares because otherwise if you look at that? You’re in trouble.